1000 Ways To Die Wiki

"WARNING: The deaths, which are real and extremely graphic, portrayed in this show are based on tragic scenarios, from movies and make-up deaths."
"Names, which in some episode segments, have been changed to protect the identities of the deceased."
"Do not attempt to try ANY kinds of horrified actions depicted."
"OR ELSE YOU'LL DIE!" (the word "DIE" reverberates ominously).

NOTE: Death segments have never been the same. Also, these bad words are very dangerous on some segments and some details.

"1000 Ways to Die" -- Segments 201 - 300

Death # "Event" Name Taken from Circumstances of Death
201 Blown Job (aka Coulrophobic Clown) Death: A User's Manual -- Segment 6 On August 11, 2007, in Miami, OH. A disgruntled, alcoholic clown, who ironically was coulrophobic as a child, drives to a birthday party for his next job. When he stops short in front of the party, a canister of CO2 rolls up against his seat, inflating a giant balloon while he is still in the car. He is too drunk to sense the danger until it is too late, and dies when the balloon presses him against the windshield and he suffocates, which means asphyxiated.
202 Reef Stew (aka Danger Island) Dead on Dead -- Segment 2 On June 14, 1981, in Fijian Islet. A Fijian tribe in the South Pacific cannot find meat during typhoon season, so they are forced to omit it from their diet, only to grow hungrier as the days continue. One night, two drug smugglers wash up on their island in search of provisions, to the delight of the tribe. The men are beaten unconscious, stripped naked, boiled alive for five hours, and eaten.
203 Hillary Snuffed (aka The Last & Final Straw) Young, Dumb, and Full of Death -- Segment 2 On November 21, 2009, in Hollywood, CA. A former reality TV star, under the delusion that she's still famous, snorts cocaine at a party using a platinum coke straw. A man attempts to take the woman's picture as she's snorting cocaine, and treats the privacy invasion as a paparazzi attack. She calls in her bodyguard, who snatches the camera from the man and punches him in the face. The man falls on top of the reality show star as she's doing a line, and the coke straw gets lodged in her nose, puncturing her frontal lobe and causing a fatal brain hemorrhage.
204 Cream-ated (aka Cow-Punked Gratefully Dead -- Segment 7 On August 20, 2008, in La Crosse, WI. A man who suffered mental and sexuall abuse from his sadistic uncle in a cow costume develops a fetish for drinking milk straight from a cow's udders. On this particular occasion, he is kicked in the head when he accidentally bites the cow's teat, and dies when his brain bleeds out inside his skull.
205 Flame Retard-Ant (aka Stop, Drop And Die) Better Them Than Us -- Segment 4 On July 6, 2005, in Burnside, KY. A pyromaniac attempts to set a tree ablaze after dousing it with gasoline. Unfortunately, he gets gasoline on his pants and ends up in flames. However, he is quick to jump into the adjacent river, but the melting of his muscles and cartilage cause shock and paralysis. The man collapses into the lake and drowns.
206 Dip N' Die (aka Tongue in Cheek) Getting A Rise From The Dead -- Segment 4 On April 8, 2007, at the Arizona Border. A illegal immigrant-hunting vigilante is driving along the border, chewing tobacco. His truck suddenly hits a rock, causing him to bite his tongue while chewing tobacco, which triggers a bout of erectile glossitis and causes the man to choke (asphyxiate) on his swelling tongue.
207 Glow Job (aka Glow Schmoe) Dead Wrongs -- Segment 4 On May 1, 2006, in Los Angeles, CA. A drug dealer does business at a rave, but gets bored when business slows down. He then decides to take a few hits of ecstasy. In his high, he injects himself with fluid from a glow stick and dies of phenol poisoning.
208 Semi-cide Life Will Kill You -- Segment 1 A man is run over and cut in half by an 18-wheeler while working under his car in a parking lot. His upper body and legs are accidentally sent to separate hospitals, making the medic crew lose some time. The man dies of pain and he bleeds out.
209 Par For The Corpse (aka Skin Game) Getting A Rise From The Dead -- Segment 3 On October 29, 2009, in Eugene, OR. In a parody of grindhouse-style zombie horror movie trailers, a teenage couple making out in a cemetery are scared off by a sickly, shambling man thought to be a zombie. The narrator then explains that the "zombie" is actually a cemetery groundskeeper with little respect for the dead suffering from a fatal allergic reaction to the fungicide he sprayed on the cemetery grass (which he unknowingly ingested by way of chewing on the golf tees he had in his mouth while using the cemetery as his personal golf course).
210 Pissed Off (aka Not So Happy Lad) Death: A User's Manual -- Segment 4 On July 3, 1992, in Monrovia, CA. An Irishman on a golf course in the United States is recovering his ball from the rough when a rat runs up his pants leg, scratches his leg, and urinates on him. The urine seeps into the scratch, causing leptospirosis, which kills him a week later.
211 Dead Mime ☺ (aka Never Mime) Death Takes A Vacation -- Segment 6 On June 26, 1997, in Portland, OR. An annoying mime who resorts to harassing passersby in a park stops to eat a pickle for lunch. One piece gets lodged in his throat and causes him to choke to death, but the passersby do not stop to help, thinking that this is part of his act.
212 Handi-Crapped (aka Hanicappable Surfin') Dying to Tell the Story -- Segment 4 On July 19, 2010, in Malibu, CA. A rude surfer often parks his convertible in handicapped parking spaces. When confronted by a Vietnam War veteran who lost his leg, the surfer refuses to confront him, opting instead to drive away. The surfboard pivots sideways due to quick acceleration of his car, hits a street sign and severs the surfer's head from his spinal cord, killing him instantly.
213 Crappy Ending (aka Happily Never After) That's "Mister Death" To You -- Segment 5 On July 18, 2007, in Bangkok, Thailand. An American tourist visits an erotic massage parlor. During the session, however, he is unable to remain aroused and blames this on a strange buzzing sound within the walls. His frustrated masseuse removes an electrical outlet to check it out and flees in terror when an Asian giant hornet flies out and stings her client. The man kills the hornet but its pheromones attract the rest of the swarm, which proceed to sting the tourist to death.
214 Safecracked Pitch Dead to Rights -- Segment 8 On May 3, 2005, in Oakland, CA. Maury is out for a walk when he sees a security vault being installed in someone's house. Later that night, Maury breaks into the house and tries to open the safe to no avail. Instead deciding to take the safe, Maury slides it outside and has to push it down several stairs. Not wanting to make any noise, Maury decides to guide the safe quietly down the steps. One slip causes the vault to fall down the stairs and eventually onto Maury, crushing him.

(This death is absent from the US version and can be viewed here)

215 Spit-Ill (aka Sloppy Seconds) Die-abestic -- Segment 1 On July 4, 2007, in Marietta, GA. A southern belle working a kissing booth for charity at a carnival is stealing the money from the jar. When her high school crush walks up to the booth, she is more than willing to make out with him. However, he had been chewing sunflower seeds, and the belle had an allergic reaction to the sunflower seed oil and died of anaphylactic shock.
216 Out to Launch (aka Merry Go-Wrong) Enter the Ferret -- Segment 4 On March 15, 2010, in Tarzana, CA. A group of stoned teenagers in a park decide to mess around by putting one of the back tire of one of the teen's motorcycles against the base of the carousel, getting on, and revving the bike up to create a large centrifugal force on the merry-go-round. With the carousel rotating at an extreme speed, one of the teens flies off and his brain stem is impaled orally on a horseshoes pole sticking out from the sandbox nearby.
217 Suck Her Punched Bringing In The Dead -- Segment 3 On October 4, 2007, in Gary, IN. A rapist lurking in the alley behind a boxing gym attacks a woman in a blue cocktail dress, not knowing that his target is actually a male boxer who cross-dresses to calm down from his workouts and gets extremely angry whenever someone calls him a "lady." The boxer defends himself by punching the rapist with a powerful right cross to his temple. The would-be rapist's brain compresses and bleeds out inside his skull, causing him to pass out and die due to blood loss and severe brain damage.
218 Samu-Fry Dead to Rights -- Segment 6 On September 18, 2001, in Tustin, CA. Two Japanese-American teenagers attempt to engage in a katana battle after watching a samurai movie and playing samurai video games. When they take their fight outside, one of the teenagers attempts to land a deadly strike on his friend, but his katana hits a low-hanging power line and he electrocutes himself.
219 Chairway to Heaven (aka Ouch Potato) Stupid Is As Death Does -- Segment 1 On November 20, 2003, in Milwaukee, WI. A deadbeat dad who abandoned his family to "find himself" (an act so heinous even the narrator says he wants to kill the man) gets drunk with his friend while setting up his new house. He brings in a pilot seat from a Soviet fighter jet, unaware that it still works. He pulls the lever on the seat and is launched 10 feet into the air, crushing his skull against the roof.
220 Scratch n' Snuffed (aka Buggered) Death Puts On a Dunce Cap -- Segment 6 On November 2, 2008, Hattiesburg, VA. A politician drops dead after being voted out of office, being humiliated by widespread news of a s** scandal involving visits to South America to see his Brazilian mistress, and going broke after his wife abandons him. When the politician was on one of these trips ten years earlier, he was bitten by a triatominae. After numerous visits and numerous bits, he to develop Chagas' disease, which in turn led to a fatal cardiac arrhythmia.
221 Rebel Without A Pulse The Lighter Side of Death -- Segment 5 On July 4, 1867 in Anniston, GA. Soon after the American Civil War, a Confederate deserter is ordered to be executed via firing squad. All of the shooters miss, but the deserter still dies as he suffers a heart attack brought on by his intense fear of being shot.
222 Car Jacked Death: A User's Manual -- Segment 5 On June 5, 2004, in Manatee, FL. A car thief attempts to steal a muscle car by descending from the garage ceiling by a rope. His leg becomes tangled in his rope, leaving him suspended upside down. Unable to free himself, the thief eventually dies from rising blood pressure and multiple strokes caused by the venous hemorrhaging in his skull after 48 hours.
223 Offed the Hook (aka Meathead, Meet Hook) Stupid is as Stupid Dies -- Segment 4 On July 17, 2003, in Black Rock, OR. A survivalist armed with a shotgun, a chain and meat hook is shown dying in three scenarios (the last of which actually happened to him). 1--Electrocuted after throwing his meat hook onto a power line so he can poach electricity for his TV. 2--Hanged on a tree branch after using his meat hook and chain to string up an elk carcass. And 3--Tripping in a ditch and performing an accidental tracheotomy after swallowing his own meat hook.
224 Snakey Breaky Neck Dead on Dead -- Segment 4 On March 13, 1987, in Manaus, Brazil. A spoiled rich man vacations in the jungle with a tour guide. Ignoring his tour guide's warnings, he lies down for a nap, and wakes up to find tarantulas all over his body. In horror, he runs out of his tent and leans against a tree. A boa constrictor then wraps around his neck, strangling him to death, which means asphyxiated.
225 Xmas-turbator (aka Wreck the Halls) Sor-Dead Affair -- Segment 4 On November 5, 2003, in Fort Lauderdale, FL. A man with a passion for irritating his neighbors (and an ironic hatred for all things Christmas) sets up a garish, Christmas light display in his yard. His latest addition to his yard display is a booming sound system on the roof. After turning it on, he slips and gets his foot caught in the cord of the speaker system. After his cries for help go unheard, the man swings back and forth, but only succeeds in bashing his own head against the house and killing himself from extensive brain damage.
226 Gasketballed Unforced Errors -- Segment 3 On November 21, 1993, in Kenosha, WI. A young couple in college climbs into a giant helium-filled basketball. Although they enjoy it at first, they begin to find it difficult to breathe in it after a while. Realizing that they need to get out, they try to, but cannot because they are unable to find the zipper to open it. They eventually suffocate to death due to the lack of oxygen.
227 Ruffed Up (aka Doggone Dangerous) You're Dead! LOL! -- Segment 6 On August 11, 2004, in St. Paul, MN. An unemployed woman desperate for another job reluctantly takes a position as a dog walker, despite her intense hatred for the animals. On her first day, the dogs drag her across the ground. She cannot break free from the many leashes tied to her wrist, and she collides with a tree head-first, damaging her temporal lobe and killing her.
228 Die Jump (aka Track and Heel) Locked and Low Dead -- Segment 3 On September 15, 1998, in Summerhill, GA. A sexy, manipulative amateur actress is chosen for a local commercial, but a businessman won't hire her unless she can demonstrate her ability to high-jump. The actress clears the bar, but misses the mat and hits the ground. She gets up, allegedly fine from her fall, until she gets plowed down by a track runner and dies when her spinal cord (which had a hairline fracture from her mat miss) shatters and dislocates, shutting down her nervous system and function in her heart and lungs.
229 Succu Offed (aka Cursed Cacti) Up With Death -- Segment 2 On July 19, 2008, in Tucson, AZ. Two stoners with a large collection of cacti return from the Arizona Desert with a stolen Saguaro cactus. They celebrate by drinking a brew of mezcal and peyote. In a shared hallucination, the Saguaro tells them they will be punished for stealing it, causing them to flee in panic. One falls on an Agave plant and gets impaled through the heart, while the other runs head-on into another Saguaro and its needles impale him through the eyes and into his brain.
230 Trailer Trashed Dead and Deader -- Segment 2 On May 1, 1979, in Aberdeen, SD. A newly married man attempts to unclog his new RV's toilet with bleach since other attempts to unclog it are unsuccessful. The bleach reacts with the sewage to form chlorine gas, which suffocates him.
231 Asphyxi-Asian (aka Afrigat-D'oh) Ready Or Not, Here Comes Death -- Segment 1 On August 12, 2006, in Tokyo, Japan. The narrator channel-surfs through a nature show and a home-shopping channel until he stops on a Japanese game show challenge featuring a conniving female contestant donning scuba gear and swimming through hoops while collecting cantaloupe. The female contestant dies of breathing in truck exhaust that wasn't filtered out of her oxygen tank and ends up drowning. The narrator points out that a story like that would make a great entry for "1000 Ways to Die".
232 Nine Inch Nailed (aka R & RIP) Star Death: The Last Generation -- Segment 7 On April 10, 1999, in Tacoma, WA. Three men hired to clean a local dump waste time by rolling in a tire down a hill with a wooden ramp. The first man passes the ramp, but when the second man rolls down, the ramp collapses and exposes two nine-inch framing nails from the ramp, which puncture through the tire and sever his spinal cord, causing neurogenic shock.
233 Chili Today... Dead Tomorrow (aka Snake-Chug) Crying Over Spilled Blood -- Segment 4 On October 4, 2007, in Pyramid Lake Reservation, NV. At a Native American gift shop, a man helps himself to a basket of hot peppers, not realizing that they are intensely hot ghost chili peppers. He fumbles in the refrigerator for a drink, but gulps down a jar of snake venom by mistake. The venom enters his bloodstream through sores in his mouth, caused by eating the peppers, and he dies of organ failure.
234 ReToaded (aka Poison Frog Attack) Putting a Happy Face on Death -- Segment 6 On September 6, 2003, in Huacaña, Peru. Two men create a video diary of their world search for the ultimate high. They end up in Peru looking for the Colorado River toad, but pick up the yellow-banded poison dart frog instead. They lick the toad's secretions, believing this will get them high, but the toad's poison paralyzes them and shuts down their hearts.
235 Wrin-Killed (aka Fearless Granny) Dead to Rights -- Segment 3 On June 8, 2008, in Pittsburgh, PA. A purse snatcher attempts to steal an elderly woman's purse. The woman, however, has 30 years of experience in Taekwondo, and beats him severely before crushing his windpipe as impressed passers-by watch in amusement.
236 Screwged (aka A Christmas KO'd) Dead to Rights -- Segment 7 On December 24, 1988, in Lansing, MI. An elderly Scrooge attacks a group of carolers gathered outside his house during a hailstorm by throwing rotten fruit at them. As the carolers run off, a large hailstone hits the man on the head, fracturing his skull.
237 Him-Paled (aka Rubbed Out) Death, The New Black -- Segment 3 On May 10, 2008, in Philadelphia, PA. A pervert uses his camera phone to get upskirt photos of women. While standing behind a woman (who is wearing a skirt without her underwear) at a streetside coffee vendor, the woman freaks out and the construction worker standing next to her goes to beat up the pervert. Meanwhile, another construction worker 8 stories up trips over a sandbag and lets go of a piece of rebar with falls from the sky and impales the pervert from his shoulder through his side, impaling his heart.
238 Washed And Fried (aka Scar Washed) Death Watch -- Segment 1 / Death By Request -- Segment 1A On September 28, 2001, in Simi Valley, CA. Desperate to make extra money, five strippers pose as college cheerleaders offering car washes. As they are washing an elderly widower's dirty van, the exposed cord of a power buffer gets wet and electrocutes all five women.
239 Crib Your Enthusiasm (aka Baby Boom) Fatal Distractions -- Segment 4 / Death By Request -- Segment 5C On September 12, 2009, in Redwood City, CA. A couple who enjoy baby-mother roleplaying build a full nursery, complete with an adult-sized drop-gate crib. During one session, the wife leaves for a brief break, resulting in her husband throwing a tantrum. Accidentally throwing his teddy bear out of the crib, the man reaches through the bars to try to grab it. He shakes the crib with enough force to unlock the gate, which falls and severs the man's vertebrae, causing him to die of asphyxiation.
240 Miner Injuries (aka Unaccompanies Miners) Death: One Size Fits All -- Segment 6 On March 20, 1920, in Fayette, WV. A greedy, apathetic mine boss yells at his workers when they tend to one of their own who has been injured, then warn the mine boss that there may be methane. The boss ignores the warning and takes a pickaxe to the side of a mine wall. The sparks cause an ignition and causes an explosion, sending rocks into the mine boss's skull.
241 Hose-Whipped (aka Hosed) Deadliest Kitsch -- Segment 2 On May 27, 2008, in Philadelphia, PA. A low-rent security guard (who has dreams of being a full-fledged police officer, despite recently failing the police exam) attempts to stop a group of scantily-clad animal rights protesters in front of a pharmaceutical company by blasting the protesters with a fire hose on full power. When the pressure becomes too much for him to hang onto, the hose slips under his legs and knocks him to the ground. The brass nozzle of the hose slams into his skull at over 30 miles per hour.
242 Slippery When Dead (aka Sleeper-y Hold) Death: One Size Fits All -- Segment 3 On September 1, 1998, in Beaver Dam, KY. A feared hot oil wrestler accepts a challenge from her rival (whom she once defeated by cheating) for a $500 cash prize. During the match, the oil wrestler beats her rival once again, but ends up dead when she slips and impales her skull on a boxing ring bell.
243 Clay Achin' Fatal Distractions -- Segment 2 On June 3, 2006, in Astoria, OR. Two stoners create a clay bong that uses flavored disks to make the marijuana smoke taste like different foods. They contact a friend with a homemade kiln. After some time, they check on the progress of the bong. After seeing that the kiln has gone out, the stoners drop a lighter into it. The lit match ignites the propane gas inside, causing an explosion, which turns the clay into deadly shrapnel, killing them.
244 Chain On You (aka Dirt-y Biker) Grave Decisions -- Segment 5 On April 25, 2007, in Lakewood, CO. Two female motocross riders are bitter rivals on their local circuit. One rider sabotages the other's motorcycle chain, causing it to snap during the next race. The broken chain flies through the air and tears into the saboteur's throat, and she quickly bleeds to death.
245 Rocky Roadkill (aka Ice Fiend Man) Better Them Than Us -- Segment 5 On September 2, 2007, in Riverside, CA. A drug dealer doing business out of an ice cream truck is mugged by a meth addict. The driver manages to get away, but upon encountering a sharp turn, the freezer topples over and leaks chlorofluorocarbon into the truck. The dealer blacks out from inhaling the refrigerant and slams into a tree, the impact of which ruptures his aortic valve and causes death by exsanguination.
246 Par Gore Ready Or Not, Here Comes Death -- Segment 2 On March 15, 2004, in Detroit, MI. While racing up the outside of a building with his friends, an arrogant parkour-obsessed teen, who makes cheating pushes one of them out of the way in order to win. On the roof, he rolls to recover from his last jump and impales his neck on an exposed pipe, severing his spinal cord and paralyzing the muscles that control breathing.
247 Eye-Sick-Kill (aka Silent Night) Dead Before They Know It -- Segment 7 On November 29, 2008, in Cedar Springs, MI. A perverted stoner gets fired from his job as a mall Santa after two of his female elves report him for sexual harassment. As the man bangs on the door to get his boss to let him in, an icicle falls from the roof's edge. The man looks up just in time for the icicle to impale him in his eye and through his brain.
248 F.U.V'd (aka Bicycle Berserker) A New App Called Death -- Segment 3 On April 20, 2007, in Santa Cruz, CA. A steroid-abusing, SUV-driving doctor enjoys harassing bicycle riders on the road. With his wife in the passenger seat yelling at him, he gets distracted, loses control of the vehicle, and rear-ends a flatbed truck carrying several rods of rebars. The rods go through the windshield and impale the doctor's skull.
249 Kill Bill & Billie (aka Honeymoon Killers) Death Certificates -- Segment 4 On May 12, 2010, in Altoona, PA. Suspecting his wife of adultery, an argumentative husband hires a hitman to follow her and, if he finds her with a man, kill them both. Meanwhile, the husband goes to a motel and hires a prostitute, who turns out to be his wife. As they begin arguing again, the hitman arrives and kills the two of them, following the husband's orders to the letter.
250 Mastur-Bitten (aka Black Light Scorpions) A New App Called Death -- Segment 7 On March 15, 2009, in Lamy, NM. A scam artist posing as a state health inspector targets a sleazy motel. Using his own semen from a furious masturbation session, the scam artist is able to extort some money as well as blackmail the motel owner into staying the night at the hotel for free by revealing the semen stains with an ultraviolet light. While sleeping on the bed he soiled, some Arizona Bark Scorpions crawl on the man's bed and sting him to death.
251 ? ? ?
252 Well Chung (aka Wang Bang) Tweets From the Dead -- Segment 5 On February 3, 2011, in Los Angeles, CA. A black market owner in Chinatown is selling poached animal parts, pirated DVDs and illegal fireworks. He finds out that he is about to be busted by the FBI and hides in his trailer. An hour later, he lights a cigarette, but drops it on the wick of one of the fireworks, setting them all off and causing the fireworks to explode, killing him.
253 War-Done (aka Headless Warden) Think Globally, Die Locally -- Segment 7 On March 10, 2009, at Ohio Women's Prison. A heartless prison warden who just banned all forms of communication with the outside world to all the female convicts confiscates a box of cupcakes meant for one of the inmates. The warden eats one with blue frosting, which, unbeknownst to the warden, is laced with PCP. The drug takes effect and the warden flies into a delusional rage, acting like his German Shepherd guard dog, marching like a soldier, angrily attacking the other guards (who check up on him), and diving off his desk. One of the guards rolls in a flash grenade to distract the warden so they can capture him, but the flash grenade rolls too close to the warden's head and explodes, blowing the warden's skull open and frying his face.
254 Booby-Zapped (aka Booby Trapped) Putting a Happy Face on Death -- Segment 5 On July 12, 2009, in Tucson, AZ. A man, paranoid to the point of paralysis and insomnia over current events, places booby-traps around his house to protect himself. To get some much-needed sleep, he takes some sleeping pills, but the pills come with the side-effect of sleepwalking. Later that night, the man sleepwalks to his refrigerator to get some food, managing to escape every trap he placed along the way. However, when he sits down to eat, a laser-operated shotgun is triggered, shooting him in the head.
255 The Depart-Dead (aka Gangsta Trapped) Stupid Is As Death Does -- Segment 3 On March 25, 1991, in South Boston, MA. A group of white, teenage wannabe-gangstas from South Boston play a drinking game called Edward Fortyhands, in which drinkers have beer bottles taped to their hands and they cannot do anything (smoke, urinate, leave the room, etc.) until the beer bottles are empty. One of them spits a half-lit cigar under a couch, which starts burning the flammable synthetic stuffing, releasing hydrogen cyanide into the room. Because they cannot open the door, they suffocate (asphyxiate) on the fumes.
256 Found Food Sudden Death - - Segment 8 A girl participates in a spiritual retreat for the first time. She is instructed by the leader to go into a river which is infested with alligators. Unsurprisingly, she is eaten by one.

(Not aired in US)

257 Pimp My Death (aka Curtain Call Girl) Death Be a Lady Tonight -- Segment 6 On April 3, 2005, in Washington, D.C. A hooker charms her way into a desperate married man's hotel room on the pretense of finding him attractive. But when she reveals her profession and insists on $2,000 for the night, the man refuses to pay leading to her calling her boss. When the man arrives, she uses their confrontation as a chance to take the $2,000 from the man's wallet, then tries to hide in the bathroom to be able to make her getaway, only for her boss to shove the man into her, causing her to fall into the edge of a marble sink and split her head open.
258 Less Is Mormon (aka Whip Trap) Death – Putting The "Fun" In "Funeral" -- Segment 3 On May 20, 2001, in Amity, OR. A polygamist cult leader is set to wed his fourth wife. His latest wife gets nervous and runs off into the woods. The other cult members go after her, stepping into fatal traps set up around the compound to keep cult members from escaping alive. The groom ends up dead from one of his traps -— a spiked board that impales the victim when stepped on like a rake.
259 De-Throned (aka Bowel-ed Over) Today's Menu: Deep Fried Death -- Segment 7 On April 23, 2002, in Las Vegas, NV. A misogynistic biker forces a bar maid to be his personal housekeeper so she can pay off a gambling debt. During her time, he intentionally makes messes for her to clean up, one of which is cleaning motorcycle parts with gasoline in the living room. The maid cleans up the gasoline by sopping it up in a rag, wringing it out in a bucket, and pouring the gasoline in the toilet, but doesn't flush. The biker comes home, throws down his beer can, and goes to the bathroom. As the biker is on the toilet, he smokes a cigarette and tosses it between his legs into the bowl. The methane gas from his flatulence gets ignited by the cigarette and the toilet blows up, rupturing the biker's pelvic arteries and causing him to bleed to death, much to the relief and happiness of the maid.
260 Down With The Clown (aka Insane Clown Posse) Deadliest Kitsch -- Segment 7 On July 23, 2008, in Los Angeles, CA. A birthday party clown stalks a horror-core hip-hop band called "Infernal Clown Posse" (played by real-life clown-music group Insane Clown Posse) with hate mail and plans to sabotage one of their concerts. The clown rushes to the front row, but is knocked unconscious when one of the group members hits him in the head with a soda pop bottle. After regaining consciousness a short time later, the clown becomes enraged, runs backstage and goes to unplug their speakers. The clown, still drenched in soda, which contains a high concentration of salt, is electrocuted to death. (NOTE: This death features the song "In Yo Face" performed by ICP.)
261 Gum's the Word Death On A Stick -- Segment 4 / Death By Request -- Segment 1B On December 9, 2003, in Palm Springs, CA. A male nurse who has love with and robs old women of their money and valuables targets an old lady who has bad breath (a disgusting fact the man finds out after the old lady kisses him). After feeling sick, he runs into the bathroom and ingests several denture whitening tablets he believed were mints. After washing them down with water that had more denture cleaner dissolved in it, the chemicals dissolve his digestive tract while removing the oxygen in his blood. He bleeds and suffocates to death (asphyxiated) on the bathroom floor.
262 ? ? ?
263 Killer Tan (aka Jersey Score) It's a Dead, Dead, Dead World -- Segment 7 On August 15, 2009, in Ocean City, NJ. Two tanning-obsessed guidos use large amounts of DHA for an instant tan. After spraying themselves by hand, they climb into a stand-up spray tanning booth and light a cigarette. The spark from the lighter ignites the DHA fumes in the booth, causing an explosion that kills them.
264 Crate and Buried (aka Air Maul) Dead Before They Know It -- Segment 3 On August 15, 2004, in Darfur, Sudan. Two thieves in Sudan steal supply crates needed for refugees. As the men celebrate, they suddenly get crushed by a falling, two-ton supply crate that had a faulty parachute
265 This Bird Has Flu (aka A Bird in The Pants) Death Certificates -- Segment 2 On September 18, 2008, in Lima, Peru. A man smuggles birds over international borders by sedating them and taping them to his ankles under his pant legs. Not realizing that the birds are infected with avian flu, he contracts it from them and soon asphyxiates to death due to fluid accumulation in his lungs.
266 ? ? ?
267 Hummus Among Us (aka Gas Attack) It's a Dead, Dead, Dead World -- Segment 2 On October 21, 2011, in Bengahzi, Libya. A black-market arms dealer offers to sell a cache of weapons to a terrorist group. While firing a rifle as a demonstration, he hits a barrel of sarin and mustard gas (mislabeled as containing hummus), and the contents spew out and kills everyone in the room.
268 Orspasm (aka Cluster F****ed) Death Puts On a Dunce Cap -- Segment 2 / Death By Request -- Segment 3B On December 24, 1993, in Beaverton, OR. A woman who suffers from PGAD is abused by her sadistic boyfriend, who takes pleasure in making her suffer involuntary orgasms. One day, as the couple climb up the stairs, the boyfriend pokes his lover in the back with a vibrating back massager. The woman goes into one of her spasms and ends up knocking her boyfriend down the stairs. The fall breaks his neck and severs his spinal cord, causing him to suffocate to death, which means asphyxiated.
269 Window Pained Death Over Easy -- Segment 6 On August 22, 1998, in Atlanta, GA. A peeping tom spies on a woman dancing around her house in lingerie. He partially enters a window to get a better look, but is spotted and accidentally hits the window support. The window breaks his neck between the C2 and C3 vertebrae, killing him.
270 Contact Die (aka Blinded Me With Science) Killing Them Softly -- Segment 2 On October 10, 2006, in New Britain, CT. A co-ed attempting to seduce her way through chemistry class distracts her nerdy lab partner, who is mixing ammonia and hydrochloric acid. As she leans over the flask, the gas fuses her contact lenses to her eyes. As she blunders toward an emergency wash station, she trips on a cord and slides headfirst into a wall, breaking her neck.
271 Raider of the Lost Narc (aka Achin' Ambulance) Death Be a Lady Tonight -- Segment 4 On February 22, 2002, in Sterling, CO. A junkie, desperate for her fix, calls in a bogus 911 call, sending a hospital's paramedics speeding out. Hiding behind a dumpster and watching the ambulances head out, she quickly rushes in through the open garage door and pockets several bottles of morphine before trying to rush back out through the closing door. But, dropping one of the bottles, she reaches back to try to retrieve it and is crushed by the garage door, which had a broken safety shutoff switch.
272 Velvet Dope (aka Dead Carpet) Death Takes A Vacation -- Segment 1 On May 21, 2010, in Philadelphia, PA. An ill-tempered bouncer (and former convict) repeatedly refuses to let two men into a club for not having money or good looks. One of the men becomes impatient and nudges the bouncer, who drives him back against an overhanging support beam. The beam snaps, with one piece impaling the bouncer through the head.
273 As-Capped (aka Killjoy) Grave Decisions - Segment 2 On June 10, 2005, in El Segundo, CA. An ex-record producer from the 1950s harasses his former band, who have been hired as the house band at the nursing home where he now resides. While threatening them with a revolver, he suffers a fit of palsy in his hand and accidentally shoots his own oxygen tank, which explodes and kills him.
274 Squirreled Away (aka When A Taxidermists Academy) The One About Dumb People Dying -- Segment 6 On May 3, 2003, in Cooper's Creek, GA. A taxidermist, who regularly eats the meat of the animals he kills, dines on squirrel meat (served rare) without realizing that the animal was infected with rabies. He contracts the virus, which invades his brain and causes him to die a slow, painful death over the course of several days.
275 Any Given Gunday (aka One in the Oven) That's "Mister Death" To You -- Segment 1 On November 25, 2004, in Los Angeles, CA. A "jersey chaser" (a groupie who likes to seduce professional athletes) sleeps with a pro football player. Due to a concussion he endured during one of his games, the player wakes up with no memory of sleeping with the jersey chaser and becomes paranoid over someone out to rob him of his money (which is the reason why he has guns hidden in his house). He calms down when he finds the jersey chaser making him breakfast in the kitchen, until she turns on the stove, which contains a gun hidden inside. The gun is heated up and fires into the woman's skull, killing her instantly.
276 Die-Arrhea (aka Die-Fecta) Cure for the Common Death, Part II -- Segmwnt 6 On February 21, 2004, in Louisville, KY. An obnoxious, renowned jockey evicted from his hotel becomes desperate to win a horse race so he can retire for good, so he becomes anorexic and starts abusing illegal Chinese laxatives to lose enough weight to race. He surprisingly wins, but dies from massive dehydration, potassium deficiency, and renal failure from the laxatives he took and no fluids to replenish his electrolytes.
277 You're So Vein (aka Lethal Injecti-cide) I See Dead People (And They're Cracking Me Up) -- Segment 4 On July 5, 2007, in Albuquerque, NM. An inmate being executed by lethal injection initially does not react to the chemicals that were injected, because the strap restraining his arm is acting as a tourniquet. When his restraints are undone, he confronts the witnesses. But before he can do anything, the poison takes effect, finally killing him.
278 Gas Holed (aka Fireball Gas Blast) Putting A Smiley Face On Death -- Segment 3 On January 5, 2009, in Palm Beach, FL. A proctologist with a fetish for women's rears begins to operate on a pole dancer who damaged her rectum during a porno movie shoot. Prior to the operation, the doctor forgets to advise her not to eat anything 12 hours before the operation. On the day of the operation, the doctor's cauterizer ignites the woman's flatulence (due to a chili dog she ate), creating a fireball which travels through the doctor's windpipe and incinerates his lungs.
279 Hole N' Done (aka Foreskins) Think Globally, Die Locally -- Segment 2 On October 1, 2002, in Flagstaff, AZ. An elderly professional wannabe golfer who now plays mini golf enters a tournament against a kindly old woman whom the crowd adores. In a rage after losing, the golfer hurls his putter at a scoreboard. The putter breaks and the sharp end impales the man in his heart, killing him.
280 Dead-Necked (aka Scold Maid) Die-abestic -- Segment 5 On November 24, 2006, in New Suffolk, NY. A spoiled teenager throws a redneck themed party as a joke on his country cousin (despite that his country cousin is a law school valedictorian). When the cousin arrives, the spoiled teen decides to "prepare the main course" and deep-fry a frozen turkey. When the frozen turkey is dropped in the pot of hot oil, the reaction creates steam under the turkey, which expands rapidly and propels it out of the pot, and into the face of the teenager, jamming the cartilage of his nose into his brain and killing him instantly.
281 Who Ded? (aka Sore Looters) Grave Errors -- Segment 2 On September 16, 2005, in New Orleans, LA. Two college-aged women disguised as disaster relief workers for Hurricane Katrina rob a church. Upon stumbling into the flooded basement, they step into the water and are immediately electrocuted by a severed power line under the water.
282 Potty Mouth (aka Dirt Eater) Fatal Distractions -- Segment 6 On July 21, 2008, in Spokane, WA. A geophagic executive of a failing loan office reaches the point where she has to eat her neighbor's organic soil to manage her anxiety, unknowingly consuming a mixture of compost and her neighbor's own feces. She ends up contracting a virulent strain of E. coli and she contracts severe diarrhea and nausea (which she brushes off as a harmless stomach flu). After three days, the E. coli bacteria spreads throughout the woman's body, poisoning and eventually killing her.
283 Deadliest Catch (aka Electrocuted Fisherman) Death be not Stupid -- Segment 6 On July 17, 2000, in Willard, NM. An easily agitated electrician tries his hand at fishing to calm his nerves, but is frustrated by not being able to make a catch. He strings a 12,000 volt electrical wire into the lake to kill the fish, but accidentally steps barefoot off the wooden boat seat onto the metal of the boat floor, electrocuting himself.
284 Hang Dunked The End is Weird -- Segment 6 On June 3, 1986, in San Francisco, CA. An egotistical bully hogs a basketball court. He makes a slam dunk and, to celebrate, hangs from the rim and pulls himself up through it. When he lets go, his necklace gets caught in the net and he hung and choked to death (asphyxiation).
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288 Chippin' Dale Unforced Errors -- Segment 2 / Death By Request -- Segment 10B On August 11, 2003, in Yuma, AZ. While two men are shredding tree branches in a woodchipper, one of the branches jams the woodchipper. Anxious to go home, one of them foolishly tries to unjam the woodchipper with his foot, but his foot gets stuck in the machine and his entire body is shredded to pieces.
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290 De-Faced (aka Snow No) Dirt Nap -- Segment 5 On January 22, 2003, in St. Cloud, MN. A man warms up his recently purchased snowblower by letting it run in his garage while he drinks several beers. The combination of alcohol and carbon monoxide exhaust fumes causes him to become dizzy and fall onto the blades, shredding his face.
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293 Freeze Died Hard Lives, Easy Deaths -- Segment 1 A man working at a mafia-owned South Philadelphia meat packing company is deliberately locked in a walk-in freezer out of revenge for stealing cuts of meat and getting his employer's 17-year-old granddaughter pregnant, and dies of hypothermia.
294 You've Got Dead Male (aka Face Plant) Dirt Nap -- Segment 3 On October 18, 2009, in Daytona, FL. A vandal rides around a neighborhood and smashes mailboxes with a wooden baseball bat while his girlfriend drives. One previous victim, a retired metalworker, has reinforced his box with a steel post; unable to destroy it, the vandal pounds on it until his bat breaks, sending a splinter into his heart.
295 Cat Fight On A Hot Tin Hood (aka Parking Fighters) Grave Decisions -- Segment 3 On August 9, 2001, in Walla Walla, WA. An overly aggressive driver gets her parking spot stolen. When she gets in a fight with the other driver, she falls on top of the hood ornament of the car, lacerating her stomach.
296 Tipping Point (aka Gratuity Violence) Die-abestic -- Segment 3 On May 8, 2001, in San Francisco, CA. Two rival waitresses working at a failing sports restaurant fight over who gets to serve a table filled with male softball players. When the fight gets physical, one waitress climbs atop the bar to body slam the other waitress, but she misses and lands on a spiked receipt holder that was knocked on the floor during the fight. She panics when she sees the receipt holder stuck in her silicone-filled breast and pulls it out. The blood from her pierced breast and heart leak out and she dies of exsanguination.
297 A Turn For The Purse (aka Invasion of the Purse Snatcher) Gratefully Dead -- Segment 2 On October 9, 2003, in Dallas, TX. A stripper living in a suburban town has her purse stolen by a mugger on a bicycle, who threatens her with a screwdriver. A nearby man sees the mugger and goes after him. The mugger speeds away, but hits his bike on a rock and flies onto a lawn, where he impaled on his screwdriver through his heart. The stripper then takes her purse back and calmly walks away.
298 Sign Offed (aka Sign Up for Death) Getting A Rise From The Dead -- Segment 1 On September 21, 2005, in Ocean Beach, CA. A sign spinner has been showing off his skills to impress a beautiful barista at a nearby coffeehouse. When a rival spinner shows up across the street, the two start trying to outdo each other and win the barista's attention. After the first spinner nearly gets hit by a passing car, he accidentally slashes his jugular vein with the edge of his sign (now jagged from repeated hits against the pavement) and bleeds to death.
299 Fansicle (aka Imbecile on Ice) Stupid is as Stupid Dies -- Segment 6 On October 19, 2009, in Cool Rapids, MI. A football fanatic paints himself in his team's colors (blue and white) and goes to a game in freezing weather. Sitting drunk and half-naked in the stands, he begins to develop hypothermia; however, no one can tell due to his blue paint and he loses the ability to speak, quickly freezing to death.
300 Bad Hair Day Death Watch -- Segment 2 On August 14, 1956, in Los Angeles, CA. A woman on a double date refuses to let her boyfriend make out with her, fearing her bouffant will be ruined. Finally, the boyfriend gets frustrated with her and the two step outside to smoke cigarettes, with the woman's boyfriend lighting hers for her. However, the flame from his lighter sets fire to her hair, saturated with hairspray. The woman dies when the fire spreads to her scalp, burning her brain.

Visit the 1000 Ways to Die website at: www.spike.com/shows/1000-ways-to-die.