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"Bibli-killed", Way to Die #124, is the second death featured in "Dead Wrongs" which aired on September 28, 2010.

Plot[]

Scammer/con artist duo Caleb and Jacob pose as preachers who travel by car with a box of unread giveaway bibles in order to disguise their true intentions; having sex with females they meet.

One day, the duo stop at a farm to "save another soul" and meet Emmy Lou, the farmer's granddaughter. While the two take turns in having sex with her, the farmer's wife overhears the noise and chases the two scammers with a shotgun. Caleb and Jacob escape and find shelter inside a grain silo, planning to flee as the farmer's wife leaves. However, they are barely able to see anything in the darkness, causing Caleb to use his lighter for light.

However, as he activates it, the flame ignites all the grain particles in the air around them, causing the silo to explode with much power as three sticks of dynamite, lkilling them and sending these impostors to hell where they belonged.

As Emmy Lou is devastated by their deaths, the farmer's wife gloats at their death saying, "A waste of good corn."

Transcript[]

([] is playing, a car comes by)

Narrator: Caleb and Jacob were phonies. With a stack of unread bibles on the backseat, they would roam the countryside, posing these preachers looking for souls to...

(Death by Riff Rock 2 is playing, 2 phonies look at the farmer's daughter)

Narrator: save.

Jacob: Hallelujah...!

Narrator: When they stumbled on Emmy Lou's farm, they thought they've reached the promise land. Emmy Lou was the picture of innocence. But inside, she was a raging cordrine of hormones and sin.

Horse: (Neighs)

(Slow and Sexy Death is playing, the 2 con-artist meet Emmy Lou)

Manuel Schuster: You might experience homostordus if giving a chance will have sex with...many many partners. Basically as many as they can get away with it.

([] is playing)

-Caleb: We are able... to see directly... into the abysm of your soul...!
-Horse: (Neighs)

Narrator: These 2 bible humpers were slicker than snapped out on a hold handle.

([] is playing)

Narrator: But they were no match for this marine heat.

Emmy Lou: I was just about to give a western a fair here rub down.

(Slow and Sexy Death is resuming)

Emmy Lou: I can do all the hands I can get. (Giggles)

Narrator: Emmy Lou took going down on a farm...

(Lubrifunkification is playing, Emmy Lou shows the duo how to brush a horse)

Emmy Lou: ...And don't be afraid to get little hard.

-Narrator: very seriously.
-Emmy Lou: Alright?

(But then, Jacob and Emmy Lou make out)

-Narrator: The 2 phonies took turns riding this rambunctious filly,
-Horse: (NEIGHS)

(While Caleb smoking outside the barn)

Narrator: but, in every farmer's daughter's story, there's always somebody with a shotgun.

(The farmer's wife hears some moaning)

-Emmy Lou: (Moans)
-Narrator: Granny knew all about Emmy Lou's barnyard activities,

(Chase to Dumpster is playing, the farmer's wife sees Caleb, calling him out)

Farmer's Wife: Hey you!

(Caleb is spooked, alerts Jacob)

-Narrator: so when she heard the cries of animal passion,
-Emmy Lou: (Moans)

-Narrator: she knew... some cock was getting it on with her hand.
-Jacob: (Moans)

(Caleb grabs Jacob, flee from the farmer's wife carrying shotgun)

Emmy Lou: Where you going? Come back!

Farmer's Wife: Where did he go!?

(The duo climbs on the shelter's ladder)

Caleb: (Whisper) Come on, come on!

Narrator: The boys found shelter on the grain silo.

(Caleb closes the shelter's lid to hide from the granny grabbing her granddaughter)

Farmer's Wife: Where is that snake in the grass!?

(Drama Purgatory is playing)

Jacob: Look, let's...make a break for the car.

Caleb: (Whispers) She's got a shotgun...!!

Narrator: There comes a time for every lost soul's lives,

Caleb: (Whispers) Where's my lighter?

Narrator: when what need most, it's a light to shine in the darkness.

Caleb: (Whispers) Okay...

(Once Caleb activates the lighter, the shelter explodes)

Narrator: This wasn't one of them.

(Demonic Introduction is playing, replay of powder floating)

Narrator: Fine powder from the tons of grains passing through the silo...

(CGI grain particles attach to the air, when Caleb ignites the lighter, causes an explosion)

Narrator: accumulated, and mixed with the oxygen in the air. When Caleb lit his lighter, a spark, spread from one floating grain to the other, creating a chain reaction.

(Back to replay of duo hiding in the shelter, Caleb ignites the lighter, causing an explosion)

Narrator: The explosion had the power of 3 sticks of dynamite.

Farmer's wife: A waste of good corn...

(Recap, [] is playing)

Narrator: Here's one for all you bible students out there:

Emmy Lou: (Gasps)

Narrator: All come from dust,

(Caleb grabs Jacob, flee from the farmer's wife carrying shotgun)

-Horse: (Neighs)
-Narrator: and to dust all return.

(The duo climbs on the shelter's ladder)

Caleb: (Whisper) Come on, come on!

Narrator: Caleb and Jacob lied...

(The shelter explodes; view of dismembered hand and rotten bible book)

Narrator: and got burned.

Casts and Interviewees[]

Trivia[]

  • The date this death happened is June 6th, 2006, which was 6/6/06 (or 6-6-6). It is a reference to the biblical "Number of the Beast" (666) from the Book of Revelations.
  • When Caleb and Jacob arrive at the farm, they were driving a 2003 Honda Accord sedan.
    • Additionally, although the death takes place in Iowa, the Accord has a Californian license plate. However, it might be possible that the duo started their journey from California.
  • Emmy Lou wears the same bikini top as Leann's in Phone Boned (even though Emmy Lou was portrayed by Peyton McCormick while Leann was portrayed by another actress).
  • Explosion looks identical to the elite V3 rocket launcher And elite Dreadnought.
  • This is similar to the imperial sugar company.

Segment Nicknames[]

  • E-I-E-I-OWW (not to be confused with Way to Die #487) (Spike TV)
  • E-I-E-I -OUCH!

Foreign names[]

  • Arder en el Infierno (Burn in Hell) - Latin American Spanish dub
  • Hechos polvo (Turned to dust) - Spanish dub
  • Colheita maldita (Cursed Harvest) - Brazilian Portuguese dub
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