"Blend-Dead", Way to Die #457, is the fifth death featured in "Death Watch", which aired on January 27, 2010.
Plot[]
Arlene was a very loving gardener, hoping to keep herself from aging. She thought that blending juices with wheat grass would do the trick. Little did she know that her wheat grass was toxic. Once in a while, while Arlene was away, her landlord would spray rat poison everywhere in her garden, including the wheat grass. Completely unaware of her landlord's actions, she consumed her blended juices anyway, but eventually, she would feel sick to her stomach. She thought more blended juices would cure the problem, but the wheat grass was still poisoned. Eventually, Arlene died while on her exercise ball after the rat poison's toxins caused internal bleeding, and a brain hemorrhage, thus sending the gardener to heaven, where she'll be young and spry forever.
"Every day began with the sound of her blender mixing up another immortal cocktail. But the more she drank, the sicker she was becoming. Never suspecting the source of her discomfort was the home-brewed mega-juice, Arlene kept knocking them down, hoping this would make her feel better."
Transcript[]
(Begins with Arlene looking at her personal garden)
Narrator: Arlene was one of those misinformed health nuts who believed she could live forever. A daily combination of wheatgrass, megadoses of vitamin supplements, and fresh veggies run through a juicer, were her weapons against the aging process.
Jeff Mulvin: Nutrition, exercise, can extend the longevity of anybody. You see these people in remote parts of Russia, where these people live to be 120, 130 years old sometimes. And they say "well it's just a basic, organic diet".
Narrator: Arlene grew her own organic wheatgrass, and tended to it with loving care. What she didn't know; her landlord would come by once a week while she was at work, and spray rat poison everywhere, including her precious patch of immortality. Week after week, her garden was being drenched in the deadly vermin killer.
Landlord: Better die sooner.
Dr Leslie Kobayashi: Rat poison's coumadin, which is a blood thinner, but we use it as a medication for people to uh, thin their blood if they have blood clots.
Narrator: Every day began with the sound of her blender mixing up another immortal cocktail. But the more she drank, the sicker she was becoming. Never suspecting the source of her discomfort was the home-brewed mega-juice, Arlene kept knocking them down, hoping this would make her feel better.
Dr Leslie Kobayashi: It takes about four days for the coumadin to enter your system if its ingested orally. It's very easy to overdose on it and become too thin in your blood.
Narrator: Arlene's blood had been thinning for over six weeks. Causing internal hemorrhaging until one day, she got on her exercise ball, and the blood vessels in her brain exploded.
(Arlene's mind breaks as it cuts to a CGI of her drinking the rat poison, the chemical compounds latching onto her red blood cells and causing internal bleeding from her kneecaps, spinal column, and eventually brainstem.)
Dr Leslie Kobayashi: Overdosed on coumadin, you aren't able to make any blood clots, and you'll have profuse bleeding into your joints. You can spontaneously bleed into your brain and just hemorrhage to death.
Narrator: Arlene thought she could live forever. Instead, she found a different forever: death.
Cast[]
- Vanessa Vander Pluym - Arlene (Lead: Intended victim)
Trivia[]
- In the United States, a landlord is not legally obligated to tend to a tenant’s garden without their permission. This prevents situations such as this one from happening.
- This is the third death in which the antagonist (in this case, the landlord) gets away unscathed.
- In the CGI, the rat poison in Arlene's system are portrayed as rats eating away.
- This death takes place 15 years after Sh*t Faced.
Segment Nicknames[]
- Ratted Out
- Wheatgrassed
- Juicepardy
- Pulp-soned Fiction
- Toxic Mix
- Poisonous Mix
- Deadly Blend
Foreign Names[]
- Licuado Letal (Lethal Blend) - Latin American Spanish dub
- Mezcla Mortal (Deadly Mix) - European Spanish dub
Gallery[]
