1000 Ways To Die Wiki

"Cream-ated", Way to Die #204, is the seventh and last death to be featured in "Gratefully Dead", which aired on January 13, 2010.


A man named Bernard who suffered mental and sexual abuse from his sadistic uncle Tim in a cow costume develops a fetish for drinking milk straight from a cow's udders. On this particular occasion, he is kicked in the head when he accidentally bites the cow's teat, and dies when his brain bleeds out inside his skull.

"On this particular trip to the dairy queen, Bernard got milk, and then some. Cow milk is really good for baby cows, not weirdos looking for a lactose injection. He clamped down a little too hard on a teat, and the cow went in for tact...and that was that."


  • Alex Katehakis - Psychotherapist
  • Dr. Khyber Zaffarkhan - Physical Medicine & Rehab


Foreign names

  • Descremado (Skim) - Latin American dub.
  • Cream-ated.jpg
    Übler Kuhhandel (Evil cow trade) - German dub