1000 Ways To Die Wiki

"Dead Fixe", Way to Die #554, is the fourth death to be featured in "Die-abestic", which aired on February 1, 2012.


Sebastian is a food critic notorious for writing negative reviews on the restaurants he visits, some restaurants even closing due to his bad-mouthing reviews. One day, Sebastian visits a newly-opened restaurant called Cafe Vistro. One of the waitresses, aware of the critic, hatches up a plan with the chef to get him to write a good review: get him drunk off martinis. In his drunken state, he accidentally swallows part of an olive toothpick while eating the meals given to him. Two days later, while writing his bad review on Cafe Vistro, Sebastian begins to suffer from peritonitis caused by an abscess the toothpick formed in his intestines, which he believes was just indigestion. However, when he visits the next restaurant, he vomits blood induced by his peritonitis, and dies shortly after, sending the selfish food critic to hell.

"Turns out his indigestion was something more serious"

Cast and Interviewees

  • John Samaha - Sebastian (lead:intended victim)
  • Katie Locke O'Brien - Cafe Waitresses (lead)
  • Gustavo Arellano - Journalist
  • Dr. Khyber Zaffarkhan - Interventional Pain Physician


  • Also called "Critical Condition" on the Spike TV website.
  • Based on the death of author Sherwood Anderson.
  • The cgi re-enactment shows him skinny and having swallowed the whole sword shaped toothpick.

Segment Nicknames

  • Critical Condition (Spike TV)

Foreign names

  • Servido en Bandeja (Served on a tray) - Latin American dub
  • Ración de Muerte (Ration of Death) - Spanish dub