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Die-Agra

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Please have massive respect to Joseph Brandon. Let him rest in peace.

1979-2019


"Die-Agra", Way to Die #186, is the seventh and last death featured in "Death Bites!", which has been originally aired December 9, 2009.

Plot[]

Cole was at his house having a meal with his wife Janine, who was trying to seduce him for both of them to make love. It is revealed that he has a condition called erectile dysfunction (ED), and from this, he became less sexually active in front of his own spouse, contributing to their marriage slowly falling apart. In order to remedy this, Cole has to take Viagra (with each pill having a mass of 100 milligrams), but he didn't handle its recommended dosage of 1 pill per day. He was secretly given 3 pills of Viagra via putting them into a glass of beer by Janine (in which she crushed them first with a mortar and pestle tool set before blending them into that drink), who thought that it could help save their failing marriage, but it didn't work as she had hoped for. Then, he gets a text message, which turns out to be from his mistress, revealing that he's also cheating on his wife behind her back, even with his current condition. To prepare his love-making action with said mistress at that moment, Cole took 3 of his own Viagra pills while in a bathroom. As said mistress was preparing herself for the same action, she secretly gave Cole 3 more Viagra pills by mixing them into a glass of beer as well, prior to his arrival to her. In total, Cole took 9 times of that medication, more than its recommended dosage. During sex with his mistress, too much blood races through Cole's system, mainly from his Viagra overdose, resulting in a fatal heart attack and sending him to hell, to which he falls on her, as she herself reacts to that with discomfort.

Transcript[]

(Music Box Death is playing)

Narrator: Janine's marriage was as dead as her husband's penis.

Janine: I'm not wearing any panties tonight.

Cole: Huh.

Narrator: Cole's erectile dysfunction had turned him... cold. But Janine had a plan:

(Flashback of Janine cooks with some pills, Tom Foolery Death is playing)

Narrator: Without telling him, she ground up 3 ED pills into his beer. That's... 300 milligrams of blood rushing penis poppers. This Janine thought, would finally get a rise out of her hubby.

Dr. Shetal Desai: The use of erectile dysfunction drive is increasing nitroxide. Nitroxide is actually compound, that's responsible for a dilating all vessels of our body. Including the vessels that lead to our heart.

(Couple dine, [] is playing)

Janine: Honey. I want you to do me on the table right now.

Cole: (Chuckles) Like what?

(Cole's phone's beeping)

Cole: Uh... Hold on.

(Innocent Death is playing)

Narrator: Right then, Cole received a text message from his mistress.

(Later, Behind The Bowling Alley Funk is playing, Cole stretches, uses 3 pills; meanwhile his mistress uses 3 pills, put on her beer and mix it)

Narrator: Before taking off, Cole slipped into the bathroom to take... 3 of his own magic love pills. Little did he know, his girlfriend was making triple sure... her lover boy would be up for the job. She dropped 3 of her own man makers into a beer.

(Female Lovers Death is playing)

Jessica Leroy, MA, MFT: If you're a man and... you're unable to achieve the quality erection, that is going to do something yourself a steam. And you're gonna be worried next time in your situation, it's just not gonna happening at.

(Cole meets his mistress)

Cole's mistress: Hey, baby.

Cole: How are you?

Cole's mistress: Drink this before we get started to hope your luck.

(The screen pauses)

Narrator: Okay, before we continue, let's do the math:

(Body Science is playing, 3 pills from Janine)

Narrator: His wife slipped in 300 milligrams. Cole himself, took 300 more. And his secret lover doused him with another 300. That's 9 times the recommended dosage.

(Cole drinks the beer, Creepy Death is playing)

Narrator: This guy was about to pin the lovemeter.

Cole's mistress: Wow.

(After drinking, Cole's sex party has started, James Brown Bond is playing)

Cole's mistress: WHOOOOOOO!!! (Laughs)

-Cole's mistress: (Moans)
-Cole: (Moans)
-Narrator: With his veins and arteries fully dilated, blood rush from Cole's head to...

-Cole's mistress: (Screams of tension)
-Narrator: his other head.

(Cole's get dizzy, [] is playing)

Narrator: His mistress didn't mind,

Cole's mistress: Whooo!!

(CGI system is shown, the heart beats too fast (210 mmHg of SYS and 150 mmHg of DIA))

Narrator: and Cole didn't notice his vision was fading. His oxygen depleted brain was shutting down. His heart was red-lining. But none of that matter. He was about to blown. With one final thrust...

(Creepy Death is playing)

Cole: (SCREAMS OF HUGE PAIN)

(Cole passes out, dies on her mistress)

Narrator: In one glorious burst of passion, Cole had come...and gone.

Cole's mistress: Ohhhh.

Cast & Interviewees[]

Segment Nickname[]

  • Too Much Medication
  • Overmedicate-Dead

Trivia[]

  • The tape transition that appears usually the end of the segment doesn't appear, and instead cuts to black. This also happens in Dead Meat-Eorite and Boris Bititoff.
  • There was no recap at the end of the death.
  • According to IMDb, Joseph Brandon passed away on March 7, 2019 from colon cancer, at age of 39, in Austin, Texas.

Goofs[]

  • Cole's mobile phone is a Blackberry, which did not exist until 2008.
  • Cole and his mistress were clearly on the edge of the bed when having sex, but when Cole collapses, they are on the side of the bed.

Foreign names[]

  • Sexo Letal (Lethal Sex) - Latin American dub
  • De corrida (On a run) - Spanish dub

Gallery[]

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