"Fat-ality", Way to Die #400, is the first death to be featured in "Putting A Smiley Face On Death", which aired on September 14, 2010.
Plot[]
Dave is a vain, overweight slacker who dreams of becoming a professional bodybuilder, but has little motivation to work out and lose weight. Dave decides to get liposuction as a shortcut to exercise, but was unable to afford it. So, he decided to recruit his equally moronic friend Johnny, to perform a D.I.Y. liposuction. Using a can of freeze spray and painkillers for anesthesia and a garage vacuum for a cannula, Dave prepares for the liposuction. Johnny makes a crude incision into Dave's stomach and slides the cruder hose inside of the incision and turns the vacuum on. For a minute they thought their crazy plan was actually going to work, but then...things very quickly turned south when Johnny had unknowingly and mistakenly latched the hose onto a piece of Dave's intestines, as he screams for Johnny to turn the vacuum off as it began sucking the very life out of Johnny's dumb fat friend.
By the time Johnny managed to switch off the shop vac and pull the plug, the vacuum had sucked up enough of Dave's intestines to cause blood loss, shock and death.
Transcript[]
(Baroque Death is playing)
Narrator: Dave had a dream:
(Dave looks at photos of bodybuilders with his face pasted)
Narrator: He wanted to look his carp and cut as a professional bodybuilder. The problem was:
("The Fat" Dave walks on the treadmill)
Narrator: Dave was as lazy as he was vain. Following the path of least persistence, Dave came up with a shortcut: (Echo) Liposuction. There was no way Dave could afford a real plastic surgeon.
(As the magazine book says "Dr. Edward Xison, ONLY $10,000 NOW ONLY $5000!", but still couldn't afford that half price)
Narrator: His solution:
(Dave calls someone)
Narrator: Do it himself. But he'd need help.
Dave: Johnny.
(Later, his buddy Johnny shows up, Tom Foolery Death is playing, hug each other)
Dave: What's up, boss?
Johnny: Dave, how are you, buddy?
Dave: I'm good, yourself?
Johnny: I'm good, man.
Narrator: Best friend, Johnny was the loyal to a fault, do anything you ask, follow you anywhere kind of friend.
(Dave shows Johnny his fat problem)
Dave: So if we just make incisions, little incisions...
Johnny: I'll do it.
Dave: Yeah, I knew you would! Nice!
Narrator: With less than half a brain between 'em, they came up with a half-assed plan:
(Dave sprays his forearms)
Narrator: For anesthesia, some freeze spray.
Dave: My arms already numb.
(He also takes some painkillers)
Narrator: And a hand full of painkillers. For the important sucking power: a garage vacuum.
Johnny: Oh! Hey!
(Johnny closes the garage door, it's liposuction time, [] is playing)
Johnny: You sure you want me to do this?
Dave: DO IT!
(Johnny cuts Dave's belly, in order to remove to the fat)
Narrator: Dr. Johnny made a crude incision. Stuck even cruder tube into Dave's stomach.
(Johnny switches the vacuum on)
Narrator: And hit the switch.
(Dave's fat now are absorbed in the vacuum)
Johnny: It's working! Hold still! Oh! I'm getting fat!
Narrator: Dave's vacuum could suck 210 cubic feet of air per minute. A normal house vacuum, is in the 30 to 40 range. Typical liposuction motor has a CFM rating of only 3.
Johnny: I don't know, man.
Dave: Make sure it's even.
Johnny: This isn't right.
Dave: Then suck even!!
Johnny: It's eaten!
Narrator: For a minute, it looked like their crazy plan was going to work.
Dave: God!
Johnny: Hold still! Woah!!
(Johnny accidentally suck Dave's intestine)
Narrator: But then, the fat hit the fan.
([] is playing)
Dave: What-!?
-Narrator: Johnny mistakenly locked onto a piece of Dave's intestines,
-Dave: What the hell's that!!??
-Johnny: Oh, dude! No!! What the fu-?!
-Narrator: and began sucking the life out of his dumb friend.
Dave: John, you idiot!!
(The female runner from outside flees from the screaming)
Dave: (Inside of the garage) Pull it out!! Turn it off!!
-Johnny: Hold still!!
-Dave: Turn it off!!!
Narrator: Before he could pull the plug,
(Johnny switches the vacuum off, Dave's intestines explode)
Johnny: Oh!
Narrator: Johnny had sucked enough of Dave's guts to turn him from a fatty...
(Dave dies from blood loss)
Narrator: into a fatality.
(Die Science 12v1 is playing, CGI cannula is absorbing the fat)
Dr. Julie Edween: A cannula is a hollitude instrument designed to go right underneath the skin, to suction at the fat self.
(Replay of Johnny absorbing Dave's fat)
Dr. Julie Edween: In this case, he used a full-strength industrial vacuum hose which pierced the skin, the fat selves,
(Back to CGI, instead of cannula, the vacuum absorbs the organs)
Dr. Julie Edween: the muscle air and through abdominal cavity, causing the intestines to suck up onto the cannula,
(Replay of Dave dying)
Dr. Julie Edween: causing blood loss, shock and death.
(Recap, [] is playing)
Narrator: It's not hard to figure out liposuction in your own garage is not a good idea.
(Johnny switches the vacuum on, sucked too much)
Dave: John, you idiot!!
Narrator: Dave didn't have a lot of brains, but he sure had a lot of guts!
(Dave's intestines explode, Dave dies)
Trivia[]
- Also called "Fatty Splatty" on the Spike TV website.
- An unconfirmed man died the same way in 1999 in New York, though his cause of death was due to a lidocaine overdose.
- This death was Runner-Up A in the "Deathiest Death" category in the Death By Request: Special episode.
- Dave's death is similar to that of Disco Bear's death in Happy Tree Friends TV episodes, "Doggone It".
- This death is similar to Bad Max since both victims had their intestines sucked out. However, Max had the intestines sucked out of his rectum, not from an open hole in the belly.
- This is one of the deaths where the narrator says the name of the death. Others are Bowed Out, Lac-toasted, and Tumble Die.
- his death takes place 52 years after Heart Beat Down.
- This death also takes place Sunitinib and Darunavir Listed in the same year. 13 Listed years after Sparfloxacin and Levofloxacin.
- The actor who played Dave also played Billy DeMayo in Freeze Died.
Segment Nicknames[]
- Fatty Splatty (Spike TV)
Cast[]
- Jeremie Loncka - Johnny (lead)
- Michael Villar - Dave (lead:intended victim)
- Dr. Julie Edween - Herself (Facial Plastic and Cosmetic Surgeon)
Foreign names[]
- Obesidad Fatal (Fatal Obesity) - Latin American Spanish dub
- Tripa-succión (Intensti-suction) - Spanish dub
- Desintestinado (Degutted) - Brazilian Portuguese dub