Killing Them Softly[]
"Death can grant you a nice and peaceful departure, or it can make you its bitch, like the scam artist who took his eye off the target, or the co-ed who tried to glide through school. There's a bitter son who dug his own grave, an oversexed couple who had a hard time coupling, a warlord whose fortune went up his nose, and two losers who sucked on the wrong hose. Hide your daughters and lock your doors. Death is on the loose in the next episode of 1000 Ways to Die."
"1000 Ways to Die" Episode 43.
Originally aired March 9, 2011.
Title references: Spoofs the popular song "Killing Me Softly with His Song" (or the Dave Chappelle comedy special Killing 'Em Softly).
-- This is the Original Episode --
Scam Eye Am (Dead)[]
Way to Die #894
Adechike
On March 21, 2003, in Chicago, IL. After a Nigerian scam artist attempts to scam a man using the "wash-wash" scheme, his intended victim catches on and runs up to the scammer's hotel room. The scam artist is standing behind the door when the victim forces it open, driving its coathook into the scammer's eye and piercing his frontal lobe.
Alt names - Killer Scam
Contact Die[]
Way to Die #270
Katie
On October 10, 2006, in New Britain, CT. A co-ed attempting to seduce her way through chemistry class distracts her nerdy lab partner, who is mixing ammonia and hydrochloric acid. As she leans over the flask, the gas fuses her contact lenses to her eyes. As she blunders toward an emergency wash station, she trips on a cord and slides headfirst into a wall, breaking her neck.
Alt names - Blinded Me With Science
Six Feet Plunder[]
Way to Die #427
Doug
On September 17, 2002. in Harrisburg, PA. A jealous man attempts to rob his wealthy brother's grave of the expensive jewelry he was buried with. After the man digs too close to the headstone, it topples on top of him, pinning him on top of his brother's body and crushing him.
Alt names - Grave Danger
Guns N' Noses[]
Way to Die #465
Tomo
On December 14, 1992, in Sierra Leone. After capturing and killing a diamond smuggler, a ruthless warlord celebrates by snorting "brown-brown" (cocaine laced with nitroglycerine-laced gunpowder). The tray holding the mixture is contaminated with diamond dust; when the warlord snorts the mixture, the particles lacerate his arteries and travel to his heart, causing him to bleed to death.
Alt names - Blood Diamonds
Trivia: This segment has also been used for "Top 100 Deaths".
Frequent Dier[]
Way to Die #95
Darren and Bernice
On November 2, 2006, in Richmond, VA. An overly-intimate couple on an airplane flight decide to join the mile high club after being told by the stewardess that they cannot have sex in front of the other passengers. While the couple try to get in a comfortable position in the cramped bathroom, the plane hits a pocket of turbulence and the two are thrown violently around until they die of skull fractures and a broken neck.
Alt names - Mile Die Club
Suck & Blown[]
Way to Die #180
Zeke and Lyle
On August 24, 2007, in Atlantic City, NJ. Attempting to siphon gas from a car, two men use an industrial vacuum to speed up the process. A spark from the vacuum's electric fan ignites the gas and sets off an explosion that instantly kills them both.
Alt names - Suck and Blow
Master E-Raced[]
Way to Die #744
Dieter
On April 11, 1945 - 1995, starts in Nuremberg, Germany and ends in Brooklyn, NY. A Nazi military officer is shot in the head during World War II and left for dead, but survives with the bullet becoming lodged near a major artery in his brain. Fifty years later, he bumps his head against his refrigerator, jarring the bullet enough to sever the artery and cause a fatal hemorrhage.
Alt names - Dishonorable Discharge
Visit the 1000 Ways to Die website at: www.spike.com/shows/1000-ways-to-die.