"Odds Are You're Dead", Way to Die #594, is the fifth death to be featured in "Grave Errors", which aired on March 2, 2011.
Plot[]
Tony & Nick were loan sharks who lent money to gambling addicts like Charles, a scissor lift operator who was willing to bet everything, Tony told him he wanted the $10,000 dollars he owed him and to get off but Charles wasn't going to get off, he was safe where he was and asked for 1 more week to pay but Tony & Nick wanted their money at that moment and since Charles wasn't coming down, Tony was going to get him down, he took out a knife and started cutting the hydraulic line while Charles told him to stop, Tony cut the hydraulic line and was splashed with liquid, the scissor lift began to fall, Nick tried to help him but the lift fell on him, crushing his left hand and severing his head, killing him and sending this impatient greedy to Hell, leaving Charles and Nick were shocked with his corpse.
"And within seconds, Tony's career as a loan shark...was cut short. Hey, he was a loan shark, not a scissor lift operator."
Transcript[]
([] is playing, 2 loan sharks open the gate)
Narrator: Are you hard up for cash? Do you need a loan? Go to a bank. Just don't borrow from these guys.
Tony: Hey, Charles! Ah, you're tough man to find!
Charles: Hehey!
Tony: Ah, you don't return my phone calls?
Charles: Hey, I've been busy, I'm working, you know what I'm saying?
(Baroque Death is playing)
Narrator: Tony & Nick were loan sharks who preyed on those addicted to gambling. Like Charles. He was willing to risk everything.
Tony: We have to little talk about the 10 grand you owe me!
(Replay of loan sharks open the gate, Anticipating Motion is playing)
Aswad Ali Brown: Illegal sports gambling and loan sharking are pretty much the same thing. We're giving you a bit of a money to play with, but we want our money back and we want it with interest. The points spreads are... you know... 1 point, 2 points, 3 points, it varies so much, so it's not really a set fixed rate, and if they don't pay you back, you can go through your own means to get your money without the courts.
(...And Now for Something Serious is playing)
Tony: Come on down, Charles!
Narrator: Charles wasn't going anywhere; he was safe right where he was.
Charles: Oh, come on, man. Just give me one week. Y-you know I'm good for it.
Tony: Fu- What'd he say, one week? What, are you crazy? What are we look like, a charity?!
Narrator: But Tony & Nick didn't feel like waiting a week.
(Nick is about knock Charles by punching his palm)
Narrator: They wanted their money now.
([] is playing)
Narrator: One way or another. And since Charles wasn't coming down, Tony was going to get him down.
(Tony draws a knife to cut the hydraulic line)
Charles: Hey, hey! No, no, no! What are you doing, man?
Narrator: He went to cut the hydraulic line...
Charles: Come on! Hey!
(Tony cuts the hydraulic line, but...)
Tony: (Screams)
(Nick runs to Tony for help, but Tony is chopped off, Alibi Rooms is playing)
Narrator: And within seconds, Tony's career as a loan shark...was cut short.
(Nick tries to get Tony out of the lift but afraid to snatch him in half)
Narrator: Hey, he was a loan shark, not a scissor lift operator.
(Demonic Introduction is playing)
Dr. Boyd Flinders: When our guy cuts the hydraulic line, the entire weight of this lift, which is tons of metal and steel.
(CGI scissor lift chops the guy who cut the hydraulic line like a real scissor)
Dr. Boyd Flinders: Comes crashing down, and scissors' his neck, crushing his windpipe, cutting through the muscle, crushing the lungs, cutting off the carotid arteries that go to his brain. And then severing right to his spinal cord.
(Replay of Tony got scissored)
Dr. Boyd Flinders: He dies from lack of blood, no intervention from his brain to his body, instantaneous death.
(Recap, [] is playing)
Narrator: Tony was a tough guy who loaned out money,
Tony: You don't return my phone calls!
Narrator: but when it came time to collect, Tony will get so worked up...
(Tony draws a knife to cut the hydraulic line)
Charles: Woah! What are you doing, man?
(Tony cuts the hydraulic line, but...)
Narrator: he finally just...
Tony: (Screams)
(Nick runs to Tony for help, but Tony is chopped off)
Narrator: lost his head.
Cast and Interviewees[]
- Michael Naishtut - Tony (lead: intended victim)
- Lee Schall - Charles (lead)
- Jahdai Pickett - Nick (lead)
- Aswad Ali Brown - Bookie
- Dr. Boyd Flinders - Surgeon
Foreign Names[]
- Apuesto A Que Estás Muerto (I Bet You're Dead) - Latin American Spanish dub
- Elevador Asesino (Killer Lift) - European Spanish dub
- Agi-diota (Loan Idiot) - Brazilian Portuguese Dub
- Salak Tefeciler (Stupid Loan Sharks) - Turkish dub
- Sanu ma ti Kabeza suryat Turak (Going as my Head goes Injured) - Lazoran dub
Segment Nicknames[]
- Morning Shift (Spike TV)
Trivia[]
- Also called "Morning Shift" on the Spike TV website.
- The name of this death is a pun on loan sharks collect debts on money used for gambling, and betting is based on "odds" or chances of a situation happening.
- The CGI graphics display an actual pair of scissors.
- Jahdai Pickett (Nick) has his own YouTube channel calls "Bigg Jah"
- Little did you know, Michael Naishtut worked in Japan before he appears in 1000 Ways to Die. His notable work is Eigo-lien (2000s), English education program on NHK ETV.
Gallery[]
