1000 Ways To Die Wiki

"Penis de Milo,"Way to Die #911, is the first death featured in "Sor-Dead Affair", which aired on February 29, 2012, along with "Locked and Low Dead".


Marcel is a sculptor who is obsessed with his work and even neglects his wife, Natalie, in the process. One day, Marcel decides to carve a lover out of marble and Natalie leaves him after he keeps neglecting her. After finishing the statue, he carves out a crude vagina and begins to have sex with it, but passes out from exhaustion. After awakening, Marcel is suffering from priapism (When an erect penis doesn't go flaccid) and can't remove his penis from inside of the statue. Marcel tried to scream for help but no one comes to him. After an hour, he finally manages to remove his penis from the crude vagina and falls to the floor. Free at last. Just as he is celebrating, the statue topples off the table and falls on top of Marcel, crushing his ribs and causing asphyxiation.

"Free at last!"


  • Jarret Palmer
  • Dr. Cat Huang-Begovic
  • Tiffany Pulvino - Natalie
  • Brandon Jared - Marcel (lead:intended victim)


  • The segment number for this death is 911, which is the number of the emergency phone only in the USA and Canada.

Foreign names

  • Pene de Milo - Latin American dub.