"Screwged", Way to Die #236, is the seventh death featured in "Dead to Rights", which aired on February 17, 2010.
Plot[]
They say the holidays are the hardest time to be alone, Bob was an old widower who had no family or friends to share the season's joy, it made sense since Bob was a grumpy old man, but while reading a book during a rainy Christmas Eve night, Bob heard Christmas carolers in front of his house, Bob smiled, not because that beautiful moment warmed his heart, but because it was a great opportunity to use up all his rotten fruit, Bob acted like a complete jerk and started bombing the carolers, as you can see folks, Bob was a real-world version of Ebenezer Scrooge; he hated Christmas, Christmas carolers and Santa Claus. The carolers decided to leave and Bob was glad, but then Lady Karma stepped in after Bob threw out those good people and the weather became as horrible as Bob's heart, and it went from freezing rain to hail.
Robert Fovell: So, in a powerful storm, you have air rushing upwards, forcing huge amounts of water vapor to condense to liquid. Now, we introduce ice particles becoming bigger, becoming heavier, and then finally, falling out of the cloud, down to the earth. If you get hit by hail, it's gonna hurt.
Then a 2-pound hailstone fell at 100 mph and impacted Bob in his thin old skull, fracturing it and killing him.
Robert Fovell: The largest hailstone weighed about 2 pounds. That will fall and about 100 mph.
Sending him to Anger, the fifth circle of Hell, where a very eager Satan was waiting.
Narrator: Bob was a grumpy old man; nothing wrong with that. But if you don't believe in Christmas, just get the "hail" out of here!
Transcript[]
(Angelic Killing is playing, Bob reads a book calmly)
Narrator: They say the holiday is the hardest time to be alone. Bob was an elderly widower who had no family or friends to share the season's joy.
(Bob hears people singing Silent Night in front of his house)
Narrator: But one cold rainy Christmas Eve, Bob was surprised to hear the sweet voices of carolers.
(Bob closes the book and gets up, Asylum Corridor is playing)
Narrator: Bob smiled. Not because this idyllic scene warmed his heart.
(Bob gets outside with a basket with fruits)
Narrator: He smiled because it was a great opportunity to get rid off all his rotten fruit.
(Bob begins to throw his rotten fruit to the carolers, Deck the Halls (1000WTD version) is playing)
Bob: There!
-Narrator: You see, Bob was a total scrooge.
-Bob: How you like that?
Bob: How you like that, Santa Claus? Ho-ho-ho!
Narrator: He hated Christmas, couldn't stand Christmas carolers, and even Santa was on his greatest hit list.
(The carolers have enough, they decide to leave. Bob is happy that they leave)
Bob: Yeah!
(Asylum Corridor is resuming)
Narrator: But then, after getting rid of the good cheer crowd, the weather, like his heart, got ugly.
(The thunder strikes)
Narrator: It turned from freezing rain to hail.
(CGI hail magnetizes the snow, [] is playing)
Robert Fovell: So in a powerful storm, you have air rushing upwards, forcing huge amounts of water vapor to condense to liquid.
(CGI hail falls onto Bob which will soon come)
Robert Fovell: Now, we introduce ice particles becoming bigger, becoming heavier, and then finally, falling out of the cloud, down to the earth.
(CGI hits Bob's head which will also come soon)
Robert Fovell: If you get hit by hail, it's gonna hurt.
(Bob decides to get back inside)
Narrator: Bob didn't get hit.
(As mentioned in the CGI segment, the hail hits Bob's head, slips and dies)
Narrator: He got clobbered.
(Replay of Bob got clobbered by a hailstone, Suspense Procedural is playing)
Narrator: A freak of nature 2-pound hailstone fractured his old and brittle eggshell skull.
Robert Fovell: The largest hailstone weighed about 2 pounds. That will fall and about 100 mph.
(Recap of Bob throwing rotten fruits to the carolers, Deck the Halls (1000WTD version) is resuming)
Narrator: Bob was a grumpy old man; nothing wrong with that.
Bob: Ho-ho-ho!
Narrator: But if you don't believe in Christmas,
Bob: How you like that, Santa Claus?
Narrator: just get the "hail" out of here!
(Bob got clobbered by a hailstone, as you can see the wound on his head)
Cast & Interviewees[]
- Bob Yerkes - Bob (Lead: Intended victim)
- Franklyn Passmore III - Santa (Lead)
- Robert Fovell - Prof. of Atmospheric Science
Foreign Names[]
- Granizado (Hailed) - Latin American Spanish, European Spanish, and Brazilian Portuguese dubs
- Sternhageltot (Star hail dead) - German dub
- Kupahamit, hilamat, tukotulanan, morti (Hailing, Flying, Fracturing, Dead) - Lazoran dub
Segment Nickname[]
- A Christmas KO'd
- The Grinch Of Hail
- Scrooge Slam
- Naughty-and-Die Christmas
- Hail-filled Karma
- Feliz Navi-Dead
Trivia[]
- This is based on stories of hail killing people.
- according to IMDb, Bob Yerkes passed away on October 1, 2024, at age of 92, in Northridge, California.
Gallery[]
