Today's Menu: Deep Fried Death[]
"What's for dinner tonight? Looks like a full menu of... death. We've got a thief who fell down a hole and bit his tongue... off, a muscle-bound ape who got juiced, a groupie who got loopy, a '70s party animal who got the point, a mean girl who got all gooey, and a biker who crapped out. We've been slaving away over a hot stove, so sit down, eat your death, and shut up. It's the next episode of 1000 Ways to Die."
"1000 Ways to Die" Episode 34.
Originally aired December 8, 2010.
Title reference: Half the deaths featured on this episode are food-related.
"Death in the 70's; a mean girl gets a chubby bunny; a juicer gets juiced; a thief bites his tongue; a groupie falls for a snake; Typhoid Mary goes down; a biker craps out."
-- This is the Original Episode --
Lawn of the Dead[]
Way to Die #129
Matthew
On May 5, 1978, in Allentown, PA. In the 1970s, a man dies during a barbecue when he gets distracted by a woman flashing her breasts after he threw a lawn dart into the air, which later falls through his skull, piercing his brain, and coming out the bridge of his nose.
Alt names - Death By '70s
Note: Comedian Charlie Murphy guest stars in this segment, providing commentary on '70s culture.
Tongue Died[]
Way to Die #438
Max
On September 4, 2008, Detroit, MI. During the 2008 recession/housing crisis, a scavenger stealing metal from foreclosed homes and sells them for scrap is caught by an obese police officer and is chased. He succeeds in escaping the police officer but ends up falling into an open manhole (the lid of which was stolen by the scavenger earlier in the segment). The impact of the fall causes the man to bite off his tongue (which remains above ground) and break his neck, asphyxiating him.
Alt names - Metalhead
Note: This segment is otherwise known as "Messy Metalhead".
Tube Snaked[]
Way to Die #119
Tina
On August 19, 2005, in Topeka, KS. An underwear-clad groupie throws out her struggling musician boyfriend after his record deal falls through and tosses out his clothes, his demo CDs, and his electric guitar. As the man drives away, the woman keeps her boyfriend's pet boa constrictor that almost strangles her to death. The woman successfully escapes its clutches, throws the boa on the grass, and goes back in the house to get drunk. The boa constrictor slithers back through a pipe on the side of the house used in expelling carbon monoxide. The constrictor gets stuck inside, causing a back-up of carbon monoxide, which kills the groupie, who mistakes her carbon monoxide poisoning for alcohol intoxication.
Alt names - Pipe Snake
R.I.P.-PED[]
Way to Die #673
Ted
On October 3, 2004, in Tarzana, CA. A 70-year-old man obsessed with body building relies on not only his exercise equipment, but his juicer to build and maintain his muscles. After years of overworking his juicer, the juicer stops, overheats, and explodes, sending the juicer's blade into his carotid artery.
Alt names - Juiced
Trivia: This segment has also been used for "Top 100 Deaths".
Mary-nated[]
Way to Die #145
Mr. Longfellow and Mrs. Longfellow
On March 5, 1908, in Long Island City, NY. A couple who is oblivious to her notorious past and her disease hire Mary Mallon (a.k.a. Typhoid Mary) as their cook and die from typhoid fever four weeks later.
Alt names - The Mary Mallon Story
Gooed Riddance[]
Way to Die #802
Carly
On November 21, 2009, in Chicago, IL. When a group of women have a reunion they promised to have 10 years ago (one of which has become a mean girl and wants nothing to do with her childish friends anymore), they play the game Chubby Bunny. The more mature one, who wins just as before, later chokes when the marshmallows melt in her mouth and clog her trachea.
Alt names - Gag Reflex
De-throned[]
Way to Die #259
Duke
On April 23, 2002, in Las Vegas, NV. A misogynistic biker forces a bar maid to be his personal housekeeper so she can pay off a gambling debt. During her time, he intentionally makes messes for her to clean up, one of which is cleaning motorcycle parts with gasoline in the living room. The maid cleans up the gasoline by sopping it up in a rag, wringing it out in a bucket, and pouring the gasoline in the toilet, but doesn't flush. The biker comes home, throws down his beer can, and goes to the bathroom. As the biker is on the toilet, he smokes a cigarette and tosses it between his legs into the bowl. The methane gas from his flatulence gets ignited by the cigarette and the toilet blows up, rupturing the biker's pelvic arteries and causing him to bleed to death, much to the relief and happiness of the maid.
Alt names - Bowel-ed Over
Trivia: This segment has also been used for "Top 100 Deaths".
Visit the 1000 Ways to Die website at: www.spike.com/shows/1000-ways-to-die.