Way to Die #929
"Turtle Waxed"
Name of the death is a pun on the famous quote in The Karate Kid
Turtle Waxed.png
Mr. Chow made a nice living by ripping off Mother Nature. She returned the favor, and made a nice death out of him.
Date August 17, 2010
Location Mojave Natl Park
Episode this death
was featured in
"Fatal Distractions"

"Turtle Waxed", Way to Die #929, is a fifth death to be featured in "Fatal Distractions", which aired on October 5, 2010.


Mr. and Mrs. Chow were out in the Mojave Park to look for animals. However, they weren't there to sketch wildlife. They were there to poach animals and sell them to illegal markets. When they spot a rare turtle, they think it would make a quick one-thousand dollars. Before Mr. Chow could grab the turtle, a bald eagle swoops down out of nowhere and picks the turtle up with its talons. The eagle tries to break the turtle's shell by dropping it at high altitude, but the turtle end up lands on Mr. Chow's head, breaking through his skull and sending him into cardiac arrest. Meaning if one didn't kill him the other did. This ends up leaving his now-widowed wife, Mrs. Chow, screaming in horror. Miraculously, the turtle survives the fall and crawls away.

Cast and Interviewees

  • Sean Roach - Wildlife Educator
  • Henry Stizare - Mr. Chow (intended victim)
  • Monica Neak - Mrs. Chow (lead)


  • Also called "Turtle Shelled" on the Spike TV website.
  • This way to die is based on an urban myth about how Greek philosopher Aeschylus died.
  • This death has the record of the nearest deaths, beating Bad Max, Pornicated and Handi-Crapped, having 49 days away from the aired episode where the date was.

Foreign names

  • Lanzamiento de Tortuga (Turtle Fling) - Latin American dub
  • La Venganza de la Tortuga (Turtle's Revenge) - Spanish dub
  • cascudo na cabeça (cascudo means noogie but it's also very close to the word casco which means "shell" and cabeça means head)
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